To say I like dessert would be a massive understatement, but even I can admit when I\u2019ve gone too far.<\/p>\n
Read more 18-year-old with autism has scars on \u2018entire body\u2019 from beatings, NC sheriff says<\/a><\/p>\n I turned 31 on Wednesday, and to celebrate, I decided to collect as many birthday freebies<\/a> as I could stomach.<\/p>\n I had no idea what I was getting myself into.<\/p>\n I arrived at the Starbucks on Tyvola Road near Costco around 9:30 a.m. I\u2019d already gone to the gym, showered and gotten dressed, and it wasn\u2019t sweltering hot yet, so I was feeling pretty good.<\/p>\n I parked in the lot at Kabuto Japanese Steakhouse because there were only a few spots available at Starbucks. I typically park away from other cars. I don\u2019t think I\u2019m a bad driver, but Geico might disagree.<\/p>\n Placing the order was easy. The birthday reward appeared in the app, and all I had to do was hit \u201credeem\u201d to get my free drink.<\/p>\n I ordered a large \u2013 or \u201ctrenta,\u201d in Starbucks speak \u2013 salted caramel cream cold brew. I figured I\u2019d sip on it throughout the day.<\/p>\n I finished most of it before I reached the next stop.<\/p>\n The Baskin-Robbins on South Tryon Street was only about 15 minutes away, but it took me twice that long to get there.<\/p>\n I couldn\u2019t find it.<\/p>\n I drove around the same three blocks at least five times before remembering that Dunkin\u2019 \u2013 which I had passed several times \u2013 is owned by the same company and often shares locations with Baskin-Robbins.<\/p>\n By the time I finally arrived, I was frustrated and hungry.<\/p>\n Baskin-Robbins offers a free scoop of ice cream on your birthday. All you have to do is show the reward in the app to the cashier.<\/p>\n I ordered a scoop of chocolate chip cheesecake ice cream and finished it in a matter of minutes. I still had plenty of room for the next treat, but finding Baskin-Robbins wouldn\u2019t be the only challenge of the day.<\/p>\n I didn\u2019t realize Culver\u2019s birthday deal \u2013 a free scoop of frozen custard \u2013 required a purchase until I got there.<\/p>\n I searched the app for the cheapest item I could find and landed on a Mott\u2019s apple juice box, which somehow still cost nearly $3.<\/p>\n My order was ready almost instantly. I sat down, devoured the vanilla custard with sprinkles and promptly threw the apple juice away.<\/p>\n At that point, I was still hungry for more. That wouldn\u2019t last much longer.<\/p>\n Everyone I know loves Nothing Bundt Cakes, including me, but it may be a while before I visit again.<\/p>\n I pulled up the birthday coupon for a free bundtlet \u2013 a mini Bundt cake \u2013 in the app and showed it to the cashier. She asked which flavor I wanted, and seconds later I walked out with a red velvet cake.<\/p>\n I started eating it in my car, but after a few bites, I began to feel it.<\/p>\n The fullness.<\/p>\n My stomach seemed to get heavier with every bite.<\/p>\n Still, I pushed on. If you\u2019ve ever had a Nothing Bundt Cake, you know they come with a glob of cream cheese frosting on top. I ate the entire thing in one bite.<\/p>\n That\u2019s when the stomachache arrived. But I still had more stops to make.<\/p>\n You can get a free Slurpee on your birthday at 7-Eleven. The problem was that I didn\u2019t actually want one.<\/p>\n Read more With \u2018teen takeovers\u2019 on the rise, Charlotte youth organizations find solutions<\/a><\/p>\n Still, I pulled up the reward in the app and headed inside. The offer came with a barcode that had to be scanned at the register.<\/p>\n I looked around for small cups and couldn\u2019t find any, so I asked the cashier for help. He told me they only had medium cups available, but I struggled to find those, too.<\/p>\n Eventually, I gave up and grabbed a large.<\/p>\n The Slurpee machine dispensed at a painfully slow pace, so in an effort to speed things up, I mixed blue raspberry, blood orange and a third flavor I can no longer remember. My body immediately seemed skeptical of the decision.<\/p>\n I took the cup to the register, where the cashier scanned the barcode and discovered a problem: my reward only covered a small Slurpee.<\/p>\n \u201cI can ring it up as a small,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n I thanked him and returned to my car.<\/p>\n For the next 15 minutes, I sat in the parking lot slowly sipping the Slurpee until it was gone.<\/p>\n By then, I was approaching my limit.<\/p>\n I hadn\u2019t planned for Publix to be the final stop on my birthday freebie tour, but it ended up being exactly that.<\/p>\n Earlier that morning, I checked the app and saw the reward waiting for me: a free bar cake.<\/p>\n I assumed a bar cake was just a small slice of cake, so I grabbed one near the entrance and headed to self-checkout.<\/p>\n As I asked the attendant how to enter my phone number, she stopped me.<\/p>\n \u201cThat\u2019s the wrong one,\u201d she said, pointing to the cake.<\/p>\n She explained that the birthday reward was actually for a long rectangular bar cake. I found it in the bakery section, and it was easily four times the size of the slice I had originally picked up.<\/p>\n There was absolutely no chance I was eating it right then.<\/p>\n Instead, I grabbed a fork from the hot bar, loaded the cake into the passenger seat and drove home completely stuffed.<\/p>\n I ended up eating about half of the cake shortly after I got back before calling it quits.<\/p>\n I was fuller than I\u2019d ever been, but that wasn\u2019t the only reason I didn\u2019t get more freebies \u2013 a lot of the deals aren\u2019t actually free.<\/p>\n For example, Wendy\u2019s requires a minimum purchase to get a free frosty, and you have to buy something at Arby\u2019s to claim a free menu item. If I got every freebie, I would have spent at least $100.<\/p>\n But I was satisfied with everything I got.<\/p>\n According to the nutrition facts, I ate roughly 3,500 calories, 530 grams of carbs, 140 grams of fat and about 400 grams of sugar.<\/p>\n For some perspective, the American Heart Association<\/u><\/a> recommends no more than 36 grams of added sugar per day for men. That means I packed roughly 11 days\u2019 worth of sugar into a three-hour birthday freebie tour.<\/p>\n On the bright side, I also managed to eat about 40 grams of protein.<\/p>\n If you know of any birthday freebies I missed \u2013 preferably ones that don\u2019t require a purchase \u2013 send me an email at emoore@charlotteobserver.com<\/a> and I\u2019ll add them to next year\u2019s list. And thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday.<\/p>\n